but i get up again
and the cycle starts over.
Thoughts don’t leave my head, memories can’t vanish no matter how hard I try. I’m alone in this fight and I don’t know how i’m going to win.
Sometimes I feel like my chest and my stomach are going to implode whenever i see pictures of her, her and myself…and her and somebody else.
I hardly smile, I stare off into space thinking what could’ve gone wrong.
I have so many questions and no answers.
What does God want for me or her? Was I a lesson that she needed to learn, or was she a lesson i needed to learn?
She’s got no challenges, and my whole life is a fuhking challenge. I was so happy and now I don’t know how sometimes.
Making movies makes me happy, but i haven’t made a movie since last year. Dancing makes me happy but I hardly have the time to and I’m hardly in the mood. Music? to many love songs…oh holy shit love songs! I can’t listen to them because my heart breaks every time! fuck…Im sick of them just as much as Neyo.
I pray and try to keep cool throughout the day, but there’s always something that-crushes me into depressiveness and hatred.
The odds were never in my favor.